how on earth am I worthy?

I hate myself.

I have so much things I wanna say and do, but I can't. why? fuck you chmel. fuck you.

dance says: anticipate
Drama says: don't anticipate

I can't focus I can't concentrate, I can't get my tutorials and I slept in a lecture. fuck. Chmels never sleep in lectures. what on earth am I doing?

I don't even dare to cry in front of people. I need to get bang by a car. now.

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IFOA CP1 Apr 2021 Exam Tips and thoughts

EDIT 202107: So.. I've passed CP1 and I thought it's a good time to republish this ________________ I have a lot to say about the study methods, but I think I'll share them here only after I've passed cause I mean.. if I fail you probably wouldn't want to learn/know my methods but here are some general exam tips EDIT: I have decided to apply what I've learned in CP1 and structure this post based on ACC :D 1. Preamble This is IFoA's 3rd (arguably 2nd) attempt at online papers for CP1, 2. Specifying the Problem The first stage of the actuarial control cycle is to identify and analyse the risks of the various stakeholders in detail, and to set out clearly the problem from the point of view of each stakeholder IFOA wants to have a fair exam, where everyone who is deserving of a pass passed Students want to pass, especially me, and will study hard to try to score well for the paper. Employers want students to pass to be able to move on to the nex...

Chmel and Friends - Sharon

母亲的爱，像一座高山，蕴藏着深深的情感关怀，就像春天里盛开的花朵，从天地之间绽放而来。女儿勇敢地闯荡世界，激情像燃烧的火焰一样，不愿受束缚，自由自在，在风中自由地飞翔。我们的道路不一样，她在人生的舞台上奋斗，母亲心里忧虑满满，但却爱她永远不变。当阴云遮挡视线，母亲温柔地拍拍我的头，只希望我能回家，心情一直挂念。看着我成长，像花儿开放，偷偷地流下眼泪，她的眼中隐藏着秘密，风雨无法阻挡，她的爱永远无边。虽然道路曲折，但爱会一直陪伴着你，母亲守候在你身边，爱你永不停息。

I'm glad you're home

The time was 3:13- it has been 2 hours since we started. She mentioned something about being on the wrong path and how there's a need to u-turn before falling off a cliff. My mind wasn't processing any of that. She bent down and showed me something on her phone: "I have loved you with an everlasting love; therefore I have continued my faithfulness to you." My mind wanders off.. Is it really true? What do I have to base on? We've been seeing each other for several months now. One thing I recall is her saying that "You've been deceived". Is that what I needed to hear? It's been a while since I've had thoughts go through my mind.. This medicine I'm taking is numbing my senses and thoughts.. The time now is 7:40. I remember her feeling thirsty and getting a drink. After a while, she told me to speak to Him. I got winded on orange . "Lead us not into temptation but deliver us from the evil one" We were created from dust and spirit in...

Caveat Lector

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